Wave Ya Cat 'Round In De Air

Max it Up - Destra

Big up Bajan and Trini massive! Cropover time in Barbados has come and gone...I wish I could've been there.

If you happen to be rhythmically inclined, just take out all the lyrics, "Max It Up," and insert, "I hate cats." If not then simply listen along and enjoy the sounds of the southern Caribbean.

As many of you know, in May of 2008 I wrote a post lamenting my wife's inability to part ways with her cat despite the fact that her husband and children all suffer from upper respiratory allergies and the steps required to function in spite of this. Annoyingly, to this day it is the number one all time most popular post on my site for reason's that escape me.

On our doctors' orders we are not to have the cat be in our sleeping areas. It's additionally troubling that every year I get a physical my lung capacity is a little less than it was the year before. And what does the doctor ask me every year?

"Still got that cat?"

To to all the 5', 4" to 6',8" 250 -380 pound, mountain women who wear organic cotton and have no friends, other than the people they work with at cat rescue centers, who have decided, a full year after I wrote I Hate Cats, to attempt to post idiotic comments ALWAYS under the name, "Anonymous" stating they feel sorry for me for hating a cat, or that I and all the commenters who have all been flabbergasted by the desire to put a partner's well-being behind that of a cat, or sending silly pics of cats beating up dogs, or without knowing me and clearly not actually reading the post, missing the comedy in the piece because of their misplaced advocacy, or passing judgment on who I am because my children and I are living under duress due to our poor indoor air quality, I'd like you to imagine two things:

1. Breathing into a Ziploc bag until you run out of air - this is what constricted breathing feels like and this condition although not brought on by cats is only exacerbated by cat dander and cat fur allergies.
   
2. Two simple and very specific words I have for you...hint, the second word is "you."
   

Despite my "hatred" for cats...

1. I feed my wife's cat.
2. I clean up my wife's cat's vomited hairballs.
3. I clean up when the cat poops outside the litter box.
4. I change the litter box (something I am under strict orders not to do due to the dust generated by kitty litter)
5. I change the cat's water daily.
6. I clean up all the hair weekly and sometimes daily that is everywhere.

My wife does about 50% of the above. Love her, but it's the truth.

If there's anything I hate...

• I hate the fact that I love my wife so much I won't put my foot down and "get rid" of the cat like everyone with a medical license and a shred of sense says I should, even with all the medication, air purifying plants and the mini-fridge lookin' air purifying machine we have in the house.
• I hate that I've tried in vain for 2 years to find a loving home for the cat instead of just leaving her at a shelter.
• And I hate that my wife, from all outward appearances, seems to be okay with this.

I'm just trying to keep it real. Best believe, I have my flaws too.

This is a blog about a man, a dad, and a husband (all the same person) and his family, not cats or dogs, although a cat and a dog can sometimes play a critical role in family as they do in mine. Everyone has their opinions, but c'mon, at least read before adding your two cents.

I imagine that this post will be so flooded with Anonymous hate that I'll have to close the comment section before the weekend is out, just as I have officially closed the comments for the most random post I've written that simply will not die. And lately, it really just makes me wanna holler...




Happy Friday Folks!


Makes Me Wanna Holler is a 2009 Black Weblog Awards Finalist!

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