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Friday

Makes Me Wanna Holla! Part I

Superman has Lex Luthor, Batman has the Joker, Spider-Man has...practically anyone with an ax to grind, and Iron Man has...I actually don't know, but the trailers for the movie are hot and Robert Downey, Jr. is the perfect person to play Iron Man's alcoholic alter ego, Tony Stark. Anyhoo, I digress, spending a moment in what my wife considers "cute geekdom" (who I am really at the end of the day). My point is that for every superhero, there's a supervillain, some jackass hell bent on ruining the good guy's day, no matter how hard the good guy tries to be. This is going to sound ridiculous but currently (as in the last 9 years) my enemy has been work.

I have to clarify and classify. I can sit up all night long writing at a desk. I've worked until exhaustion renovating a property I owned. When my daughter was born I only slept less as a drunken college freshman and I cleaned and washed all day long for fear that she would grow up maligned if there was a speck of dirt in her presence (now she eats food off the floor). This stuff I live for, the thrill, the desire, the challenge of toiling physically and mentally. I LOVE this!

I HATE work. Work is getting up at some ungodly hour to take a train with a gabillion other people who believe they're more important than you, so you can go sit at a desk and piss away eight hours of your life pushing papers back and forth, answering phones, sending emails, goofing off online, and looking for other jobs on the sneak. Oh and the best part: doing all this with people you can't stand, would never spend time with anywhere EVER ANYWHERE, who probably feel the same way about you. I have existed in this deadening conundrum for longer than I care to realize and I still do to this day. My mother was a teacher for 37 years. My father worked for the University of Illinois doing something with his Ph.D. for even longer. When God was deciding what to pass on to me from my folks, this level of dedication to a gig got left out of my DNA entirely. Other than a healthy dose of Christian faith, I have most of the characteristics of an anarchist.

Like A-Rod, and T.O. (but unlike their salaries and entitlement) I bounce around until I find the right fit. Better put I'm simply not challenged. This is the right fit. Writing is a love affair. Sometimes I hate it. Many days it hates me. It has left me full of disappointment and as of recently it's been making me feel real good about myself. As I put pen to pad I feel alive. Unlike a job, I have yet to reach the end of my creativity and I enjoy the chase. Honestly, I don't hate work, my hat is off to those who have the stamina for it. I just find it to be God-awfully boring and lately I feel like I'm spending more money than I have between transportation, childcare and an occasional lunchtime splurge to make money. Making all this that much more intolerable is where I currently work, which I won't discuss here until I'm working somewhere else.

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