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The Way To A Woman's Heart: The Stupid Dance

Recently, a few single friends of mine have thrown an interesting question my way. It wasn't what I expected --- the usual, "Why did you get married?" Instead it was, "How did you get married?" I guess in 2009 seeing someone you like, having sex with them and dealing with the fallout of having gone to bed with a psychopath just isn't what it used to be anymore. If it was ever anything to begin with.

Getting back to that question. It definitely posed a challenge because I honestly never thought about it. I didn't make a conscious effort to have someone fall in love with me. I didn't plan on getting married nor work to find the woman who would say I do. But as I think back what I did do was to stop taking myself seriously. Completely.

Better put, I stopped giving a you know what about what anyone thought of me. I don't know what brought it on. I distinctly remember waking up on the morning of my 28th birthday and not caring anymore. I just got tired of it. I still dressed to impress, but I sought to impress no one but myself. I didn't sweat not having the things I thought I should have, I developed an immediate appreciation for the things I did have. Life became a beautiful thing that I was able to clearly see. I published a horribly edited book of my poetry and short stories. I gave notice at a job that made me absolutely miserable and landed a new one within a week of handing in my resignation letter. I learned to laugh at myself, with myself and for myself. I actually became quite self-centered after liberating myself from the whims of others. But none of this meant I was a eunuch. When it came to the women I had a simple requirement for relations(hip): she had to be able to laugh with me, at me and at herself. She also had to be able to put a sentence together and not leave her house not looking like who did it and ran, but that's a another story for another time.

Truth is folks, I've let time and circumstances chip away at this freedom I once basked in. This past Thanksgiving I had a chip on my shoulder the size of Texas (shout out to all my Texan readers) because I did the very thing I'm saying not to do here --- I let the thoughts and subsequent actions of others bother me. My daddy blogging brother from another mother, Outnumbered Is Jason Mayo, wrote an excellent, but depressing post, The Saddest Thing I've Ever Heard, about the decline of laughter from childhood to adulthood. I'm going to take up his challenge and laugh in the face of all the crap life throws my way. I can't holler all the time.

I've never been above random outbursts of silliness. Typically music has been at the source of these incidents. As a child who began playing piano at the age of six, music has always been intrinsic to my life. And with music comes the dancing.

That's right, the dancing.

I'm that guy who knows how to dance thanks to cotillions, step shows, school assemblies, etc.. But I'm the guy who chooses not to. I like to have fun with music, any and all kinds.

Such as the theme music to the original Taking of Pelham One Two Three:

I did about 7 more takes of this, but my wife liked this one the best. Especially the part where I was rolling around on the floor.

Yes, folks, I was THAT guy in the club and made no bones about it. If a woman was too uptight to be bothered with my very obvious antics, then it was her loss, plain and simple. When my wife and daughter saw this video they both were curled up together laughing until they cried. That's what I'm talkin' about.

If the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, the way to a woman's is definitely through laughter.

My bottom line to the single set and us tight, stiff, serious married people with children - know that it's okay to be light and be silly, even stupid, from time to time and make sure you're with someone who is able to do the same or at least appreciate you for being that way.

Self Portrait

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