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Four Ways To Argue With Your Wife Over Absolutely Nothing

After an exciting weekend of butting heads with the wife I've nailed down four sure-fire ways for men to make themselves miserable for absolutely no reason:

  1. Sit in the passenger seat of your car while she drives.
  2. In the name of spending time together, go shopping with her, and have nothing to buy for yourself.
  3. When she starts talking under her breath, don't ignore it. Find out exactly what she said.
  4. Tell her she's being dramatic. Especially when she's being dramatic.
I've become so practiced at this, if it were an Olympic event, I'd have a gold medal in self-torture.

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