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Wednesday

Allow Me To Reintroduce Myself

I've been keeping secrets...

I've been going through a lot lately. Painful, heart-wrenching, gut-busting stuff. What's even more painful is the growing realization that I have played a major role in all of the above mentioned misery. Hopefully in time I will have the courage (or plain insanity), or best stated: permission, to share.

If you've haven't noticed, there are overarching themes that have developed on this blog. For a while I was making light of a lot of my early missteps as a father and husband. Then I just started speaking specifically to my experiences as a father. I then began to mix a little bit of weight loss and inspiration in. As I've moved closer toward my personal weight loss goal I've now migrated into discussing being your best --- the best employees, the best parents, the best person you can be --- in order to effect change in your life and the lives of everyone (intimate or stranger) around you.


The Wind At Your Back

In order to do this however you have to have a grasp on who you are. So that you can know where you begin and end. So you can know what to fix and what to leave alone. So you can know who to be and how to be in the midst of a constantly changing life. So although there may be plenty of surprises that crop up in front of and around you, you won't be caught off guard by any surprises coming forth from you. As has happened to me. Trust me, you don't want to be surprised from within.

In order to swim through this life effectively, with the wind at your back and joy in your heart, you have to have a solid grasp on who you are. You must.

At the end of last week, I answered the question of "Who are you?" on a post on my big brother site, Black And Married With Kids, the following way:

My name is Eric Payne. Most people in the blog world know me as E.Payne. I'm a Man, A Dad and A Husband. I am a son to two loving and God fearing parents. A nephew to countless aunts and uncles and a cousin to even more people. I am a Child of God. I am made in His Image and as such I am eternally optimistic, frustratingly faithful (to some) and have no problem relinquishing authority to the Most High when I've run out of answers and strength. I am in the process of rebuilding my life as it has gone off course in the past few years. I have a purpose here that goes beyond just being a committed and hard working father. My walk has gone far left of center or straight but the whole while God has been with me, not letting me go too far, not allowing me and my flesh to mess things up too much. Who am I? I am God's Handiwork with some good old fashioned sloppy humanity mixed in. I am a work in progress and I am blessed.


This is who I am right now. Please think about it for a while and answer below if you feel comfortable...Who are you?


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