I've been offline for several days now and I can't say I missed it given what I've been up to.

Men have egos and our egos prevent us from considering we might not know it all or better put in not knowing it all, we would prefer not to show our hand to this reality and struggle on in darkness...

Many of you know I've been taking photos for the past several months. But my first real photo was one I shot through a decimated gold smelting factory window in Aruba. The image was of a cloud, perfectly framed by this old, stone opening. I believe this picture was destroyed when my storage unit flooded a few years back. I remember getting the film from wherever I got it developed and thinking to myself, Wow, this is amazing. I wish I could do more with this...

The year was 1996 and my passing fancy passed.

I began to write and piled that photo onto the heap of talents genetically passed on to me by long gone relatives and my father. In this pile is acting, singing, piano, poetry, even directing. But none of that was real. A job was real. In order to survive I needed a job.

I've been limping through one job after the other since I first thought this ridiculous thought, dying slowly from 9 to 5.

And here we are in 2010 and I'm known in these blogging circles as E.Payne. After dispensing with my dream of being a published author I've been writing about family and man stuff and I snap some photos here and there. I get a lot of positive feedback on my blogs.

"You have a gift."

"You should write a book." (This one hurts the most. If you had any idea how hard I've tried).

"I love it. Your family is beautiful. You take great pictures."

The last one is the one I hear most often. Great is a word I don't like because I know and cross paths with people so much greater than me. Unbeknowst to most, I've struggled with the photos I take. I take forever to set up the shots. They never come out looking right to me. And the classes I've considered are either outrageously expensive, too in-depth for my needs, or because I'm self taught and am able absorb information like a sponge, I've been ahead of the curriculum and bored easily.

In short: I needed a challenge. Something like a KNIGHT Workshop.

For those of you who don't know, Ross Oscar Knight is the gentleman who photographed my wedding in Barbados. And if you've ever visited his site or blog, you'd know he's the real deal. I liken him to Neo from the Matrix because some of shots he has set up don't appear to follow the laws of physics, lighting or anything else tangible. From our first meeting he exuded an energy I recognized --- an energy I felt being sucked out of me --- maybe it was family life, maybe it was too many failed expectations, maybe it was just me. Recognizing the dearth of positive people in my life (thanks to my wedding) before the event was over I insisted that we become friends, something that as a man was a very weird exercise for me considering neither one of us are second graders and there was no alcohol involved when I approached him. It was business and I was prepared for him to dismiss me with a "Yeah," only to never hear from him again. But he didn't and we've hung out here and there between NYC and Atlanta for the past two years.

So you can imagine the hard gulp I had to swallow when I approached him about taking his workshop --- an intense two day experience that has the potential of exposing whether photography is something you should be doing or something you should be appreciating --- from afar.

Ross was more than happy to welcome me as his student. Last Thursday I flew down to Atlanta and on Friday and Saturday I was treated to a master at work. I was in the presence of hard work, discipline, talent and skill. Something most would quickly call genius and attribute directly to him. But I felt something else. I felt like I was in the presence of someone who God has chosen to do something --- in this case take photographs of people entering one of the most supposed sacred rites of passage known to man --- marriage. I heard His presence in many of the words Ross spoke, many he may not have been aware he was speaking. It was in his conviction to share his talents with others rather than be miserly with them.

Initially I was overwhelmed and slightly intimidated. I also felt like a slob as a guy with no job burning through my savings like an arsonist. There I was sitting in front of a dude who is successfully running his own business and seeing the world on his terms. But my time there wasn't about my present state, or the devil's whispers in my ears, it was about the place where I need to be. I got over myself quickly. And spent the rest of my time focused on the destination.

Ross is not Jesus, but I did go to the place where I knew he was going to be and I touched his robes. Now, I have a road map and an eye for things that I didn't have just a few days ago. Now I'm beginning to catch things with a camera that previously I was only able to paint with my words.

After my time in Atlanta I took a surprise trip home to my native Chicago and spent a couple days with my folks. Before Ross' workshop I can't say I would've been able to so quickly and accurately snap a pic of my father sitting in one of his favorite chairs in his favorite spot by the living room picture window, casually surveying the street outside. I'm not sure I would've captured a moment that happens so often no one in that house even notices anymore. It's not the best picture in the world (I desperately need a new camera). But I noticed the serenity and the power of it and I captured it. Now the moment is forever. Now it is timeless.



Stay tuned.

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Just a quick check in more for a friend than for me. As many of you know I'm friends with author, Bernice McFadden. We've known each other since the late 90's back when people answered landline phones, having a cell was a commodity (not to mention the phone was huge) and everyone had a pager either hooked onto their belt or at the bottom of their bag.

I was beyond honored when Bernice asked me to shoot her for the back cover of her new book, Glorious. She told me, "I need something different, something new," with a blahze sigh as she's prone to do.

I remember being excited and then immediately scared. How am I supposed to do this? I'm just snapping pics of my baby. What if I screw up? Instead of caving to these fears I focused them and began reading up on lighting and portraiture and practiced on my daughter, my most willing and able subject (I am creating a monster, by the way).

Good thing, because Bernice's Brooklyn brownstone is a dark and sensual place, best for writing and other unmentionable activity --- not so much snapping photos. But I set up as best I could, I struggled for sure trying to make it work and after three hours I saw it in her eyes that she was done.

It took me a couple of weeks to pick the best shots out of the 400 or so that I took, but I got it done. This morning, I put together what I thought was a really nice Flash presentation with clickable links and etc., etc., until I watched it and saw that it looked like crap. Not willing to spend anymore hours sitting in front of the screen I whipped up the following slideshow (that I'm not too thrilled with) of a couple of my favorites. I wanted to shoot her coming out of the shadows/darkness as it's been that kind or road for her for the past year or so. Also she's a force to be reckoned with like light, one of the strongest forces that I'm aware of. Light always overpowers darkness even if it's the size of a pinhole.

Check out the world of Bernice McFadden. She also blogs over at Naki.

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Once again, I'd like to share another father like myself who floats around in cyberspace opining about fatherhood and everything else in between. He's also a serious superhero fanboy so as far as I'm concerned, he can do no wrong. Like Mocha Dad he's a Texan, and like any good dad out there, he's committed to his kids and a servant and protector of his wife. Ladies, don't get excited over the word servant. I was being Biblical.

Without further ado, presenting my next Father in Focus: Mister Man


Where do you live? What's your occupation?

I live in Houston, Texas. I am a financial analyst for a large engineering & construction firm. I am also pursuing a doctorate degree in business administration. My main occupation is being a good father to my kids, a good husband to my wife, and to lead my family according to the Bible (to the best of my ability).


How many children do you have, how long have you been married?

I have an 11 year-old daughter and a nine year-old son. I have been married to the love of my life for 12 years.


When did you start blogging and what inspires you to blog?

I started blogging in February, 2009. I have always had a passion for writing, but have been too busy with work and school to write for pleasure. I promised myself that I would begin to write for pleasure again once I completed grad school. I am inspired by many things, but I tend to write about topics that I am passionate about: fatherhood and family, faith, manhood, and politics.


What does being a dad mean to you? How does being a man of color impact this?

Being a dad means everything to me. I often tell friends that it is difficult for me to imagine my life before my children came along. I take the responsibility seriously as every good father does. In terms of being a man of color, it has no impact on the way I parent my children. My kids are being taught that they are just as good as anyone else, can achieve whatever they desire, and to learn to become servant leaders. In the few instances where my children have encountered racial issues, we discuss them candidly and reinforce that they are made by the Creator who sees no color.


What are the challenges, the perks of modern-day living with a family?

The biggest challenge that I see for families today is combating the negative messages that are consistently being relayed to our children. Our children are becoming more desensitized to sex and violence thanks to television, the Internet, and video games. Each family must take seriously the charge to love, protect, and serve their family and the larger community.

The greatest perk of modern living with a family is when I see my children practicing a value or lesson that we have instilled in them. Parents repeat things so often to their kids, so it is nice to see when something sticks.


What has been one of your most memorable moments as a father? As a husband?

The first time I heard the heartbeat (through an ultrasound) of my eldest child and the flood of pure love that washed over me at that moment. I realized then the precious gift my wife was carrying.


What advice/recommendation would you give to someone about to become a father and/or husband?

Don’t rely on what other people tell you about raising kids. General information is okay at times, but don’t let anyone tell you how to raise your children. What worked for your parents will not necessarily work for you. Your kids are unique and special and should be raised as such.
Love your children and don’t be afraid to show them affection. You won’t regret it and they will always remember it.

Lastly, whatever behaviors you model, expect your children to follow your lead. Be mindful of what you say and do if you don’t want it to be repeated.


If you could accomplish anything through your blogging, what would that be?

If I could accomplish anything through my blogging, I would want it to be life change. I hope that the words I write touch or impact people in such a way that will improve their lives.

Thanks, Mister Man!

Paul Easter, author of the blog, “Dear Mr. Man”, is married and a father of two. He enjoys outdoor grilling, enjoys fine cigars, and serving others through his faith.





Where You Can Find Mr. Paul Easter:

• Dear Mr. Man


• Dad-Blogs: Don’t Blame The Man


• Dear Mr. Man on Twitter

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There's more than just me (man, dad, husband) out here typing into cyberspace. I figure it's about time I begin to showcase some of them for you, my most loyal readers. Hopefully you'll check them out and subscribe to their blogs also.

First on the list of my new Father In Focus series is a blogging buddy who goes by the handle Mocha Dad. For my interview with him, please continue reading.


EP: Where do you live? What's your occupation?
MD: I live in Houston, TX. My occupation is Health, Safety, and Environmental Director.


EP: How many children do you have, how long have you been married?
MD: I have three children (ages 8, 5, 2) and I have been married for 12 years.


EP: When did you start blogging and what inspires you to blog?
MD: I started blogging in August of 2008 to counter the negative stereotypes regarding black fatherhood. I wanted people to get a first hand account of a black father who is intimately involved in his children’s lives. My children inspire me to continue blogging. I want
to use my blog as a historical document that chronicles their lives. When they become adults, they will have a tangible document that charts their growth, development and special moments to share with their children.


EP: What does being a dad mean to you? How does being a man of color impact this?
MD: Being a dad means being fully involved in your kids’ lives. Many dads rely on their wives to handle all the details of their children lives, but when they do this, they miss out on bonding opportunities. Kids grow up so fast. I spend as much time with them as I can because I don’t want to have any regrets when they are adults. I like to take my kids shopping, visit them and their teachers throughout the school year, and play games with them. Something as simple as reading a book together makes a huge difference in a child’s life.

I don’t think that race has anything to do with being a dad. I’ve spoken with fathers of all races and our challenges are the same – protecting our children, providing for our children, giving them a set of values, and teaching our children how to be productive citizens. Of course, many black dads grew up without fathers as role models; consequently, many of us are winging it. But we cannot use that as an excuse to shirk our responsibilities. Dads have to be committed to their families in order for them to be successful. Part of that commitment requires sacrifices and some men, regardless of race, are unwilling to make those sacrifices. Fatherhood is difficult, but it is also the most rewarding job we’ll ever have.

One thing that bothers me is that people congratulate me when they see me out with my kids. They say things like, “It’s good to see a black man out with his kids,” or “You’re a great dad.” I’m not seeking any accolades because I spend time with my kids. I’m just doing my job as a parent. I’m looking forward to the day when seeing a black man spending time with his kids won’t be such a novelty.


EP:What are the challenges, the perks of modern-day living with a family?
MD: Raising kids now is much more difficult than it was I was I growing up. Kids have so many distractions and so many more ways to get into trouble. It is important to find a balance between protecting our children and allowing them to find their own way in the world. That’s why it is important to have a both parents involved in raising children. Men and women have different perspectives about certain things and kids benefit because of these different perspectives. My
wife is much more protective than I am. I have to balance her protectiveness with my desire to let the kids explore the world and even fail in order to develop their personalities. Together we can usually come up with a decision that is right for that particular child.

One of the perks of being a father is coming home each day to a chorus of “DADDY’S HOME!!!!” and receiving big hugs from each of my three children and my wife.


EP: What has been one of your most memorable moments as a father? As a husband?
MD: My most memorable moments as a father and as a husband have been the births of each of my children. Those moments will forever live in my memory.


EP: What advice/recommendation would you give to someone about to become a
father and/or husband?
MD: One problem that many parents encounter is that they place their children before their marriage. All parents need to make their marriage a priority. Make time to nurture that relationship before any other. Children are more secure when they can see that their parents’ have a strong relationship.

Also fathers need to make sure that they are available to their family. We all fall into the trap where we think our main role is to provide for our family. Therefore, we neglect our family because we are too busy working. We must remember that taking care of our families is our most important job. Taking care of our families is much more than just providing for their financial needs. We have to address our families’ emotional and spiritual needs as well.


EP: If you could accomplish anything through your blogging, what would that be?
MD: I’d like to inspire other fathers to be more involved in their children’s lives. I don’t intend to portray myself as a perfect father because I have several faults. I just hope that people can read my blog and see that I’m just a flawed human being who is working to do his best with the gifts, talents, and blessings that God has bestowed upon me.


Thanks, Mocha Dad!


Where you will find Mocha Dad:
His Blog: Mocha Dad
His Review Site: The Mocha Dad Review
Twitter: Mocha Dad on Twitter


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Set in the present-day Democratic Republic of the Congo, Ruined follows a young woman's nightmarish path to Mama Nadi, a savvy businesswoman who—in the midst of a complex civil war— both protects and profits from the women whose bodies have become battlegrounds. At once heartbreaking and captivating, Ruined pays homage to the courageous and resilient women who must piece themselves together after the ruin.

Source: Theatre In Chicago

I had the absolute pleasure of seeing this wonderful play last night as the guest one of my former acting teachers (and now friend) from Harlem School of the Arts. Aside from the amazing Pulitzer Prize winning playwright, Lynn Nottage's emotionally wrenching and almost impossibly layered and textured work, and the amazing multifaceted performances put on by all the actors - I was especially tickled because I met nearly all of the cast a week earlier at my friend's home. It was an intimate little gathering where they dined, chatted casually and played...Taboo.

Ruined is an amazing play complete with some of the best actors I've seen. And as someone who's seen many plays on Broadway (numbering in the double-digits), I was knocked off my feet by this slick, Off-Broadway production.

Ruined's Condola Rashad (Sophie) & Quincy Tyler Bernstine (Salima)

If you're into the theatre, this is one you don't want to miss. It's curtain closes on September 6th of this year. There's still time for those of you who are in New York City or intend to visit in the coming days. Purchase your tickets for Ruined here and be a witness to something very beautiful.

Peace...





Never Miss A Post

It's the weekend, folks and I rarely cater exclusively to my male readers or those who drink beer. The summer is nearly over, but it's still the summer and these are the hot days of August. I'd like to introduce you to a friend of mine, a beer writer by the name of Ale Sharpton (of course that's not his real name). You can find his column at J'Adore Magazine. Talk about turning a passion into profit. This guy got his start back in the day writing about 40 oz. malt liquor, if you can believe that. Now he travels the world, drinking exotic beers, experimenting with pairings and writing it all down. I reconnected with him down in Atlanta last week and he gave me a quick clinic on a very tasty beer.

And I don't even like beer.

Presenting, Ale Sharpton:





Happy Friday! Stay tuned next week when I do a little backtracking, rehashing older great posts and presenting new stuff like the soca remix of I HATE CATS.

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Last year on Father's Day President Barack Obama gave a campaign speech (sorry, but it was) at my aunt's church in Chicago. He called for Black fathers to stand up and own up to their responsibilities.

I listened to a decent amount of it and even have it posted in the LINKS section of this blog, but I was very distracted --- not because his words weren't profound --- but because he wasn't talking about me.

Two Friday's ago, I got to sit down on a web panel with a couple of great fathers: Fred Goodall of MochaDad.com and Lamar Tyler of BlackAndMarriedWithKids.com. For an hour we discussed our experiences and our opinions on what this whole fatherhood thing entails.

Click the link below to actually hear us in our own words ---
http://blackmomsclub.ning.com/page/do-good-black-fathers-exist

Happy Father's Day!

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I've decided to take a break from my usual Wednesday Question of the Week.

For those of you who are looking for something special to buy the mother (yours and/or the mother of your child/children) in your life (Mother's Day is around the corner); for those of you who need to buy something for the woman in your life to celebrate whatever special occasion needs to be celebrated; for those of you who typically don't buy [insert bad word] for your friends, lover(s) or family and need to start; or maybe you've been wracking your brains trying to figure out the perfect birthday gift for the friend you believe has it all and is impossible to shop for.

Look no further. Welcome to Tara Payne's only jewelry store: Jewelry for the Fashionable (excuse the redundancy). Yeah, we're related...she's my sister-in-law (remember my wife and I met because we have the same last name). But as a native of Chicago and its politics, I'm allergic to nepotism having witnessed so much of it growing up. I'm showcasing this woman and her collection of handmade jewelry because like myself, Tara's dreams don't exist inside a traditional office. She gives birth to beautiful things for others to appreciate and hold onto (and buy). Below is a screenshot of her store. Click on it and you'll land at her homepage.





Tara has serious fashion background and she can make a shirt better than Gordon Gartrelle any day of the week. She has graced the offices of Abercrombie & Fitch and Polo-Ralph Lauren, to name a few. The girl can draw her whosiewhatsit off and the jewelry she makes BY HAND is in a word: incredible. My personal favorite is a piece she'll never sell --- a charm bracelet she wears that stretches halfway up her right arm from her wrist. The thing looks like it weighs 30 pounds and I believe I've only seen her without once.

Check out her store and shop. She's just that good. She doesn't even know I'm featuring her today, so there's no kickback to me.

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This past Saturday my mother sent me a text message notifying me that my Uncle Frank was admitted to the ICU at some hospital in Racine, Wisconsin and that she'd give me details later. When I spoke to her later, she told me he wasn't doing well, but for some strange reason couldn't tell me what was wrong with him. But my mother can't give me any amount of information when I ask for it so I wasn't too surprised. Despite his prognosis, whatever that was, she prayed over him and remained optimistic. And so did I.

My father, ever the stoic, didn't share my mother's optimism.

The next morning my mother called me in as chipper a voice as she could manage then told me Uncle Frank (Franklin Delano Payne - named after the President) passed away at 3 a.m. in the morning after succumbing to colon cancer. I can't say we had a relationship and as what often occurs upon the death of a distant loved one, I was quiet for most of the day regretting that we did not. He was younger than my own father by one year (my father was long in the tooth before having me), and leaves behind a wife and three daughters. He was one of my father's six brothers and two sisters. Now, only four brothers remain.

I'm very proud of both sides of my family, but I am particularly proud of my father's side. Products of Mississippi (I can say the "M-I-crook'd letter, crook'd letter I...." thing really fast --- you have to be REAL country to know this, let alone say it without pausing or blinking).

Dating back to the mid-1800s, there hasn't been a single head of household on my father's side who was not a landowner. The earliest record I could find on Ancestry.com to substantiate this was my great grandmother --- a woman who was born in 1852 and died in 1968.

Yeah...they stick around on my father's side.

Growing up in Chicago, I would visit my own grandmother in Wisconsin every summer. Only in my college years did I realize she owned the entire corner of the street where she lived. Retired from a career spent cleaning white folks' homes, once a month she would go door to door to the two other homes on her plot, collect checks and come back home to watch the soaps. Talk about gangsta? That was real gangster. Or rather, true entrepreneurship understood long before it was en vogue to package it in classes, books, tapes and CDs.

Economy be damned, this year will be the year I own land. I've owned a co-op but a co-op is merely four walls inside a building you share with many. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's just not what I want. For the sake of my own family and to continue in the tradition of my own lineage I will have a homestead.

I take solace in the fact that Uncle Frank was a witness to history last week. Many that have come before him were not, at least not in physical form (for those of us who believe in an afterlife). I appreciate him. I honor him. I salute him.

Peace.

At 4 o'clock?! Yeah, I've been real busy today and blew my normal blogging window. So instead of talking up all the stuff I had planned, I'm going to keep it simple.

I've met a new friend in cyberspace and she's got a really great blog. When I first stumbled upon it, I said to myself, "Another, random blog." Of course I can say this now because I'm no longer random like I used to be in the past I am A DADDY/HUBBY BLOGGER!

Whatever...

But after taking the time to read Brookey's Blogspot I discovered it's a really cool spot to read and share. When I read it I feel like I should be in a lounge somewhere chillin' with a drink. I'm not exactly sure why. Maybe it's because she has the kinds of discussions I'd probably have with a woman or group were I to strike up a conversation at a lounge. Maybe I just need to go out more. I don't really think she's going for this effect, but it's definitely working. She covers everything from relationships to the current NFL rivalries.

She's cool. Check her out...Brookey's Blogspot.

It's not all about me, even in this strange pocket I'm creating in cyberspace. It's 4 o'clock in the morning and I'm suffering from insomnia. When it was cold, my wife was upset for various legitimate reasons. Now that it's hot, she's upset...again. And I'm wide awake, annoyed by this and other predicaments revolving around her. Why I was surprised by this particular predictable probability is beyond me, but c'est la vie. It is what it is.

I have a friend who is a very accomplished and successful novelist. Her name is Bernice McFadden and she hails from Brooklyn. Like me, she has her own blog. And like me, we're both born in September, one day apart from each other. Like my wife, she's of Bajan decent. And like my wife (before she met me), she is a single mother. Her daughter is a beautiful young woman who was beginning to tower over me a few years back when she was barely into high school and I'm not short (all of my tall friends, male and female, disagree with me on this point). She's also the author-friend I reference any and every time I tell the story of how I met my wife --- the woman currently in the back room of my house sprawled out across my bed, who in her outrage threw all the sheets to the floor and has our room looking like a crime scene.

I first met Bernice via email. I was promoting my little book of poetry and short stories and somehow she caught wind of me on the Internet. The proactive woman that she is, she reached out to me to congratulate me on my success, wish me well and let me know she had a book coming out herself.

Sure she did, I thought. I didn't trust the net and I dismissed her as a crackpot until a few weeks later when she sent me an evite for her first booksigning at the Barnes & Noble Booksellers in Park Slope, Brooklyn. Her email opened and displayed beautiful cover art for her book. It was then that I realized she was a real author and I made sure I attended her first signing. We've been friends ever since.

Bernice's first book was the Sugar, a literary masterpiece that read like a good piece of sheet music. She followed this work up with a series of novels that thrust her onto the literary stage, releasing her forever from the prison of 9-to-5 work life and allowing her to travel everywhere for good reason and no reason at all. In an effort to repackage herself and hit the market from both sides, she donned the pen name Geneva Holliday and began writing...ahem...Urban Fiction (normally I choke when I say "Urban Fiction", but the gag reflex apparently doesn't exist when typing). Her latest book as Geneva Holliday is entitled Seduction. It's on display and on sale in the right hand column of this page, as are some of her other books.

Bernice has been an inspiration to me over the years. She simply got sick and tired of being sick and tired of work and put her talent to work for her. Now she's all deep with sexy pictures and candles on her website and rockin' locks (she's always had them) looking like she's getting ready to pull a guitar off her back and start strumming slowly. And to top it off she's got a "I don't give a..." disposition a weak man might find disarming. But she's absolutely pleasant.

Congrats, Bernice. Much continued success to you.

I'm still waiting for dinner in your gourmet kitchen.

I woke up this morning to the sound of driving rain. Gray days and dreary weather forces us to slow down just a bit, just enough for us to listen to ourselves...our footsteps, our heartbeats, and all the other people who inhabit the planet with us. At the very least in NYC you have to be on guard to protect against having an eye gouged out by another's umbrella while walking down the street.

Today my wife was mad at me, not an uncommon event in my life as a married man. I won't say she didn't have good reason to be. Funny thing, is that she decided to ride the train with me to work (but why travel with me if you don't want to be around me?) and I felt her chill most of the way in. She left the house without her umbrella. I offered mine, but she passed preferring to get soaked. She walked ahead of me and I watched her, slightly saddened that we hadn't made it through the night before without going to bed angry. Something my mother told me never to do.

On the train I listened to jazz on my iPod and read the Piano Lesson by August Wilson. Outside, the rain peppered my window with a steady spray of water. The waters of the Bronx River were beginning to rise and spread out onto the parkland bordering it. Ideas and imagery flooded my mind as these kinds of days are the ones when I'm most reflective, introspective, romantic and creative.

My mother sent me a text message telling me our neighbor, Judge Pincham, passed away in his sleep at 4:30 this morning from lung cancer. A weight pressed into my chest, depriving me of air for a moment. He was 82 and his wife has been gone from this world since 2005. Judge Pincham was The Man. Handsome, suave, always dressed nice and a judge for cryin' out loud. He had the biggest house on my block and I always walked past it in awe. I didn't even know his real name until I was practically in college.

The Honorable R. Eugene Pincham was born poor in Alabama and rose to the heights and perils of being an outspoken litigator and eventual public servant. A position that can be especially perilous when you're Black. More times than not my neighbor was in the media being quoted and castigated for some outrageous (and often funny) statement he technically shouldn't have made given his station in life.

Judge Pincham had me over in his office a few years back. The walls were lined with nearly every Chicago politician that's ever been a politician and there was a trophy case packed with baseball paraphranalia and trophies. He told me about a time when he worked as a waiter at Lundy's in Sheepshead Bay, Brooklyn and met and served Jackie Robinson his dinner, and what it meant to be a Black man at that time. Many times when I think of home I think of that story he told. Now it means that much more to me.

Rest in peace, Your Honor.

Last night, I had drinks at Maroons with a former vendor of mine who was in town. I hired him back in October of last year to shoot my wedding in Barbados. While he was there everyone referred to him as "The Photographer." It was probably one of the smartest business decisions I've ever made (besides being a nice surprise for my wife-to-be). He made us look like celebrities and a week hasn't passed that at least one person hasn't mentioned our pictures.

These days I simply call him Ross. Now it's his turn --- his wedding is just a few days away and I want to take a moment to wish him well by wishing him the best.

Congrats in advance, Ross. Many blessings to you!