Yeah, that's me full tilt on the Disney sauce. It's been almost two weeks since I posed for my wife here (she rolled her eyes as soon as I posed). Although it's only been a short time I feel like I've been gone for centuries. Each day the "magic" fades just a bit more than it did the day before. Of course I am thankful I have the gift of life and I'm gainfully employed but I'm no longer waking up to the sound of the ferry that shipped patrons to Epcot. There are no more smiles that greet me in a ginormous lobby. The traffic I'm in now isn't headed to happy-land. No one is asking me if I'm enjoying myself or if I need anything. I'm not powering up at 9 pm in anticipation of a fireworks show that is better than the one that happened the night before. I'm back to my usual station --- the wonderfully exhilarating but thankless job of being Dad. Dad who isn't buying everything he's being asked for. Dad who is saying, "no" and "go to bed" and "throw out the trash."

By my pic you might think it was my first time there and not my daughter's. She went full tilt on the Princess sauce and didn't have a care in the world. Neither did I and that's a good thing at a place like Disney World where you can wind up spending the equivalent of half a year's worth of mortgage payments or more once the smoke clears. In the eyes of a storyteller (myself) Disney is a monster storytelling machine, selling narratives at every turn from the time you wake up until you return back to your hotel or resort wishing you could do more before morning and excited to get going the next day.  Stories, whether written or visual, create the canvas for the mind to imagine and dream. I wasn't about to let something like money get in the way of my daughter's, and to some extent my own, desire to plunge as far down the rabbit hole as possible.

So how did I and how can you experience the Disney Vacation YOU want to have without being left in the poorhouse upon your return to reality?

The scene at Macy's, Lennox Square on February 2, 2013. And yes, that is a kid chef with Chef, Marcus Samuelsson.

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At nearly 8 million views I am clearly late to this party. The story of my life these days. I'm not a car, I'm an eighteen wheeler. All my many wheels are spinning in different directions. Some of them are even twirling like tops.

But I digress...

My first viewing of the video was while I was in church this past Sunday. The service revolved around getting out there and doing something for your community. They played this and my heart was warmed.



"If Michael Jordan had quit, there'd be no Space Jam."

Priceless.

Don't be boring.

Don't give up.

Have fun.

Make it happen.

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It launched a thousand ships (not hardly).

It saved us of all our sins (not even close).

It turned all to stone who gazed upon it (uh...this isn't Greek mythology).

But what this is is the look that all parents have given their child at least a dozen times. Even more if they are teens.

A few days ago, on the way to school I told my daughter, "I love you," to which she responded, "I know." When I asked who told her she answered,

"No one has to tell me. I just know because you are my father."

I wish all kids knew love like this and could speak on it.

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Thanks for reading! Follow me on Twitter at @EPayneTheDad.

I used to believe my ability to make decisions, the careful deliberateness of the whole thing was based on my thoroughness. Not only did I believe this but it was seconded by a close friend and frat brother who felt the same of himself.

During my marriage this deliberateness hasn't always proved to be desirable to my other half. In fact it was the source of much resentment of me by her a few years back. To which I shrugged my shoulders and thought Deal with it.

But at nearly forty-one I know differently now now that I've been around long enough to start looking backwards. Long enough to connect dots that once were just scattered points in my timeline.

I realize now that my decision making has had less to do with deliberation and more to do with inability. As a child all of my decisions were made for me, as they should have been outside of maybe choices in candy, some toys and maybe colors of pants. As a teen all of my decisions were made for me, as I'm not do sure they should have been. I have a very loving but a very controlling father who in his desire for me to succeed may have removed from me a critical tool to succeed: the ability to choose.

At boot camp this morning I came in first place in my group doing suicides/windsprints the length of a football field while carrying a 20 pound medicine ball. My secret? I do stairs and piggyback rides on a daily basis with a 58 pound daughter.

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Thanks for reading! Follow me on Twitter at @EPayneTheDad.

Most days being a father is thankless, so much so that you don't even think about it --- all the things you do, all that you endure and all that you give by day's end. But most men, even the toughest, of which I am not (the toughest), come face to face with matters that will test and sometimes batter their mettle.

During days or times such as these you may feel that you are alone and no one but maybe God is there. But then compassion comes from the tiniest of places. You hear a small caring voice ask, "Dad, what's wrong?" as I did last week. A voice filled with the love and compassion of all the angels up above. And if you're like me, you answer honestly, or at least as clearly as possible so that young mind you're responding to understands the unnecessary complexities of the world of grown ups.

"It's okay, Dad."

That was my daughter's soft and caring response. She put her small hand first on my shoulder and then on my cheek as she sat in my lap. I felt more compassion than I can describe in this 15-second gesture. I looked into her eyes and she smiled at me. I took a deep breath to keep from crying and ruining her time at the park. In the next breath, nearly half my sorrow was gone.

There is no greater power than the power of love. There is no greater blessing than to have a child who is able to exercise that power.

I am too thankful to be sidelined by the thoughtless actions of men (and women) because of the thoughtfulness of my children.

And my daughter was right. It is okay.

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Thanks for reading! Follow me on Twitter at @EPayneTheDad. To learn more about me, you can read my story.

I never knew what it would feel like to be 40 and to have as many years behind me as I potentially do in front of me. I couldn't anticipate what being a father to a boy about to become a man would look like. And I never considered the joy I'd feel watching my daughter perform on stage for the very first time in her very first school performance, as she did yesterday.

Yet here I am in the midst of it all, living it, breathing it, in awe of it, blessed by it and struggling to fight back the tears because of it.

I wonder if my parents felt the same way when I walked the same steps my children are walking.

This is the Circle of Life.


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Has the Labor Day Weekend snuck up on you and the kids and now you're stuck trying to figure out what to do? Please no worries. I've got a great listing of events compiled by Atlanta With Kid.

For families that decide to stay in town for the Labor Day weekend, there are plenty of fun events around town to keep you busy.

Check out our round up of fun, family-friendly events on Labor Day Weekend in or around Atlanta

1. Dragon*Con Parade @ Atlanta

You don’t have to be a geek to enjoy the Dragon Con parade. This annual convention is one of the biggest fantasy and sci-fi convention in the country. If your kids love Star Wars like my kids, they will probably enjoy this parade. Head downtown to watch the parade in the early Saturday morning and have a chance to interaction with almost-real costume. Beware that some costume might be more realistic than a little one can handle. Use your parental guidance and judgement call on this one.
Also check out our ultimate guide to Dragon*Con Parade for Families with Kids
Make sure to head out early to secure a front row spot. Limited parking so it’s best to use Marta to get to downtown.
Place: Downtown Atlanta
Date: September 3, 2011
Time: 10AM
Cost: FREE

2. Arts on the Creek @ Johns Creek

This Music & Arts festival is hosted by Johns Creek Chamber of Commerce. The festival is a fun family friendly filled with performances, art exhibits and children activities.
Place: Perimeter Church 9500 Medlock Bridge Road, Johns Creek, GA 30097
Date: September 3-4, 2011
Time: Sat 10am – 5pm , Sun 1pm-6pm,
Cost: FREE

3. Sixth Annual AJC Decatur Book Festival @ Decatur

Calling all bookworms young or old, it’s time to check out the 2011 AJC Decatur Book Festival this Labor Day weekend. Meet your favorite authors, check out various children activities, listen to the Live music performed by nationally touring musicians, watch Cooking demonstrations by noted cookbook authors and enjoy food and beer from local vendors. This is a Bookzilla size festival that will entertain the whole family.
Place: Downtown Decatur, GA
Date: September 2-4, 2011
Time: See event schedule here
Cost: FREE

To view the rest of this list, please visit: Labor Day Weekend 2011 Events In Atlanta With Kids.

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I saw this quote this morning over at the Real Dads Network Facebook Page and said to myself, "That's my, Dad!" When I think back to my own childhood, I'm not sure that my father ever told me anything (other than what to do constantly). Other than helping me with homework he never lectured me on how to live. He didn't have to. I saw how he lived and was the recipient of the fruits of his labors and very isolated stumbles. And if I stepped out of line I knew what was coming next. And no matter how long I put off the inevitable, it inevitably came. Always.

I think in today's day and age the conversations need to be had because the very media that I'm using to communicate with you is having the ultimate impact of making our kids unimaginably tech savvy but becoming less and less intuitive when it comes to real world communication and sensory perception. (Especially when a kid is crossing the street against the light about to get run over by a semi-truck because his/her face is buried in a phone and they actually believe the truck needs to watch out for them). But c'est la vie. I can't and won't live in what once was. That's why I'm here now, and so are you. If you're DAD or MOM keep your game face on and keep those kids of yours from getting it twisted. As exhausting as it may be you gotta do it.

When you're done here pay a visit to the Real Dads Network's Facebook Page. This NYC based non-profit has as it's mission the positive promotion and support of fathers, married, unmarried and divorced. These guys have the premier Daddy-Daughter Dance popping off every Valentine's Day and they have a very impressive line-up of events the first week of June 2011 celebrating all things DAD. If you're looking for a great cause to support. This is it!


E.Payne is the author of the soon to be released DAD: As Easy As A, B, C! and I Didn't Invented Sex. For the past 3 years he has posted 600+ articles about fatherhood, marriage and everything in between here at Makes Me Wanna Holler.com. To learn more, click here.

The New York City Department of Heath and Mental Hygiene sent me the following infographic showcasing the landscape of HIV/AIDS among women and girls in New York City. This coincides with today's March 10 observance of National Women and Girls HIV/AIDS Awareness Day.

According to the infographic an estimated 31,663 women aged 13 or older were living with HIV/AIDS at the end of 2009.

In 1985 only 290 New York City women were living with AIDS in 1985. Over a 14-year period this number rose to 19,156 in 2009.

Probably the most staggering of the several statistics illustrated is the following: Black and Latina Women account for 60.2% of the NYC female population but they make up 90.7% of women living with HIV/AIDS in NYC as of 2009.

(Click for the full version)



Let's get the conversation going with our kids. You know the one...about sex. We need to have "the talk" with our girls and our boys. As difficult as it may be, not doing as you can see is creating tragic results on the epidemic level.

NYC Knows is a public initiative carried out by the New York City Department of Health and Mental Hygiene. The program aims to increase HIV and AIDS awareness by promoting free testing facilities, treatment centers and prevention education. The ultimate goal of the NYC Knows program is to have every citizen of New York City knowing his or her HIV status. For more information or to become active in the initiatives check out Facebook.com/NYCKnows or NYC.gov.

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E.Payne is the author of Investing In An Emotional Letdown and I Didn't Invented Sex. For the past 3 years he has posted 600+ articles about fatherhood, marriage and everything in between here at Makes Me Wanna Holler.com. To learn more, click here.

It's not often that I get into matters of religion in this space. I save that for conversations with my mother, my family, select friends and a pastor who personally counsels me from time to time. But I will today.

I grew up saying my blessing/grace before every meal. My father led the prayer and if he wasn't around then my mother did. I have been saying the same 3-sentence grace since learning it and I have in turn taught it to my family. My wife says it, my son says it and my daughter follows along mouthing it with the intention of being able to say it on her own very soon.

Then she (babygirl) decided to throw us a curveball.

"Daddy, Daddy! I have a blessing I want to say," she announced before dinner not too long ago.

"Sure go ahead." We all waited for her to stop giggling and she said:

"Dear God, we love you. Thank you for this food. Amen."

My wife loved it and clapped for our daughter. My son loved it as well as it shortened the usual grace by about 45 seconds and allowed him to bury his face in his plate that much quicker. I thought it was cute, but like a Pharisee was skeptical of the "meat and potatoes" of the blessing. Regardless, we've been alternating between hers and "ours" ever since.

Just yesterday it hit me like a bag of bricks: My daughter begins her grace by saying "We love you." I've never said that --- not even once before giving thanks and asking that my meal, anything from a hamburger to a salmon fillet, give me wisdom, health and strength. My little one is giving praise and then thanks. Her little "2-sentence" blessing is more potent than the most long and drawn out "sermons" at the table. It has more meat and potatoes than any I've ever heard to date.

Out of the mouths of babes. She is so ahead of the curve.

Photo Source

E.Payne is the author of Investing In An Emotional Letdown and I Didn't Invented Sex. For the past 3 years he has posted 600+ articles about fatherhood, marriage and everything in between here at Makes Me Wanna Holler.com. To learn more, click here.

I'm a little out of the loop right now but I hope the commercial below is shown during the Super Bowl. For any man who was once a boy and for all parents who have children with fresh and large imaginations there is no way someone can't relate to some if not all of the below.

The first six seconds of this commercial are almost identical in tone and detail to the original Star Wars movie from the white hallway with the black floor to John William's orchestral score. This was the scene when George Lucas debuted of one of the baddest baddies of them all: Darth Vader. Except for the fact that this "Darth" is only three feet tall, clad in plastic, wearing a helmet that's entirely too big for him and probably has nary a sinister intention short of having mind control over dolls and the family dog.

As someone who contemplates "The Force" at least once a week this commercial hit home. It was a double whammy, reminding me of my childhood and causing me to smile about the silly and fun moments of parenthood.

It's only February, but I'm nearly ready to claim this as the commercial of the year. But that's just me.

Agree or disagree? Hot or not? Is it a smash or simply trash?

E.Payne is the author of Investing In An Emotional Letdown and I Didn't Invented Sex. For the past 3 years he has posted 600+ articles about fatherhood, marriage and everything in between here at Makes Me Wanna Holler.com. To learn more, click here.

Day 2 of being snowed-in in the ATL, I decided to get the kids active. I just happened to have my cell phone handy:








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Over the weekend my daughter's hair was unbraided and out, all over the place. At one point, I pulled it back into a ponytail for her and marveled how her curly tresses are nearly to the middle of her back.

Me: "Oh my God, baby girl! You have so much hair."

She smiled at me and looked like she was blushing.

Me: "Can I have some of that hair? Please!" I begged, playfully. "I need some hair."

She: "Nooo, Daddy!" She giggled.

Me: "Why not?"

She (still giggling): "You have to go to the wig store for your hair."

I literally busted out laughing, shot her a stern look, and then went back to laughing with her laughing at me.

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As I was putting my daughter to sleep last night I asked her what she was thankful for.

"My family!" she answered, almost as if I had asked a stupid question.

It's the little things...

The holidays, particularly during this era of economic uncertainty and hardship can be a source of great anxiety if not dread. But before you go too far down the rabbit hole of hopelessness ask your child (avoid teens at all costs) what he or she is thankful for. If you don't have one then they can be easily found at the homes of friends and relatives. You'll be
surprised how their simple, innocent answers can put things into perspective for you.

I want to challenge you to take this one step further. Write down everything you have. Not your needs or wants but exactly what you have. More than likely there'll be at least one thing on your list that will give you cause to be thankful.

Pass it on...



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