I'm off to the ATL in this rainy weather. Stay tuned next week when I reveal my discovery of Happy Cakes.

Peace.

Go Cavs!

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My wife and I will be in Atlanta tomorrow on business (hers). This of course required us to coordinate the who, what, when, where for our kids.

My son had his own plans that he decided to share with me yesterday when I picked him up from school.

"Dad, so I'm gonna pack tonight and after you drop me to school tomorrow you can take my bag to Grandpa's so I can just go there after school."

"Okay...wait, what? Why?"

"Because it doesn't make any sense for me to go home if I'm going to Grandpa's."

"You're grandfather won't be home until 11 o'clock tomorrow night. He's going to pick you up after his flight comes in." (He's currently away on business).

"Oh, he told me nine."

"Yeah, that's when he lands. But that's still late. What are you tryin' to do, just hang out here until he gets home?"

"Yeah, I can just do my homework until he gets home since afterschool (his tutoring program) isn't happening."

"So, you want to just hang out by yourself the whole night?"

"Yeah, why not? I'm just going to do my homework and watch TV."

"What are you going to eat?"

"I'll just make something or walk to the pizza shop."

(blank stare - mine) "I applaud your desire to have a night to yourself, maybe at 16, but not now."

"Why not?"

"Because you're 13."

"But, Dad ---"

"Ask your mother when she gets home and see what she says."

3 hours later, he asked my wife the same question.

"Uh, that'd be a negative," she said without even considering the line of questioning I pursued.

"Why not? I can take care of myself for the night," he pleaded.

"Because that's not your job and I want to see you before I leave tomorrow and your grandfather won't be in until almost midnight."

"But I see you people everyday!"

(Loud adult laughter)

"And you will until you go to college," I chimed in. "You'll miss these times when you're about 30."

"No, I won't," he said, half-laughing himself.

"We'll see," I said unfazed by his comment. I went back to watching the Lakers and Nuggets while my daughter began her descent into cranky, insanity that is our signal that it's time for her to go to bed.


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Last Thursday my son wrote the above title of this post on the white board just outside his room. The trip he mentions was scheduled for the next day. I thought it was funny that he would write down that he should plan to have fun on the trip, but then I got to thinking. In many ways he's in a far better place than us miserable adults who need to be entertained and typically expect the worst in most situations (can I get an Amen!) rather than making sure we have fun and find the good in whatever it is we are doing.

"Have Fun At Your Week This Week." At least give it your best shot.

Peace.

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My son has been harassing me to see Terminator Salvation for the past seven days. Every day he asks me the same question: "Dad, we're going to see it, right?"

"Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad, Dad?!" [insert scream here]

Each time, I answer yes, I do so slightly more frustrated than the last time.

My wife came home from work yesterday to tell me that the critics said it was heavy on action thin on plot.

REALLY?...And the first three Terminator movies had layered, textured plots?


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Sometimes humor is the best medicine. There was a time when every post I published was reportedly funny. Then once I began to get a little serious and layered a commenter stated:

"That's it? I don't get it, where's the punchline?"

As if my life was some sort of joke. But, hey, that's what I was presenting.

For the time being the lighter side is where I need to be. To keep things fresh for myself and to keep things sane. A blogger (friend in my head) who's a star at this writes over at Hot Chocolate Caramel Mocha. Check her out. She's hilarious.

On to my discussion on Osmosis:

Two days ago I was watching the Laker game and don't remember blacking out just before the end of the first half. I was still recuperating from a weekend paintball match, and just happened to have a splitting sinus headache that erupted into a tension headache that made me run from light like my name was Lestat. Last I remember I was sitting upright, wide awake and the Lakers were down.

Midway through the second half my wife went to turn down the volume and I sprang up to say: "Don't turn it off I'm watching it!" She explained that she was merely turning down the volume.

I instantly went back to sleep. My head was tilted back on my neck, mouth wide open and I snored until I woke up at 1 in the morning. (The wife couldn't sleep that night so she working on her grad school applications in the dining room).

Here's the thing: I don't remember any of this. I only found out about this when I read about it (taken verbatim here) on my wife's Facebook page. One of her friends commented that men are able to watch TV with their eyes closed and backs to the screen because they take in the game by some sort of osmosis.

...makes sense to me.


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...so far.

For new visitors and for not-so-new visitors I wanted to list my most viewed Posts of 2009 to make looking around the site a little easier. Check 'em out and as always thank you for stopping by!

I hope you enjoy reading. I enjoy writing it.

1. I Hate Cats (this one just won't go away)
2. About Me
3. My Archive Page (not the most interesting page in my opinion)
4. My Piano Keys - Her Mom Is NOT White
   
5. 7 Things You Should NOT Say To Your Wife
6. I'm Leaving My Wife
   
7. The Power of Laughter
8. Frat Life
9. The Best Medicine
   
10. Black Love?
    

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Lately, I'm really in love with the wife. Over the weekend I played around on iTunes looking for as many (but not too many) songs that made me think of Spring romance and reigniting love anew. And so I came up with the following playlist: (you can download it here by clicking) Spring Love
- "a neo-soul collection inspired by Springtime love. Something you can listen to before and during a romantic dinner in, and on a long weekend drive with a lover..." or however else you want to.

Enjoy!

SONG - ARTIST

Good Morning - John Legend

A Long Walk - Jill Scott

Dancewitme - Maxwell

Back in the Day - Erykah Badu

Cross My Mind - Jill Scott

Remy Red - Angie Stone

Me and Those Dreamin' Eyes of Mine - D'Angelo

Soul Sista - Bilal

Hopeless - Dionne Farris

I Belong to You - Lenny Kravitz

You Got Me - The Roots

Sobeautiful - Musiq Soulchild

Somekinda - Dwele & Antwan Gardner

Pretty Wings (Uncut) - Maxwell

Love Rain (Coffee Shop Mix) [Featuring Mos Def] - Jill Scott featuring Mos Def

You're the One That I Like - Raphael Saadiq

You - Raheem DeVaughn

Seconds of Pleasure - Van Hunt

Outside Your Door - Me'Shell Ndegeocello

Lady - D'Angelo

Honey Molasses - Jill Scott

Kiss Me On My Neck - Erykah Badu

Luxury: Cococure - Maxwell

Slow Dance - John Legend

Know You Now - Amy Winehouse

Pop Pop - Angie Stone

Baby Come Over - Hil St. Soul

Stay With You - John Legend

Love That Girl - Raphael Saadiq


If you don't have these tracks or want a few of them you can download Spring Love on your iTunes account right now.

Check out my Mother's Day Playlist while you're at it.

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One of my fellow Dad bloggers, Coupon Dad, is hip to everything discounted and seemingly everything free. And I'm not talking about free bars of soap or pencils. I'm talking about albums, shopping sprees, and so on.

With that said, I figured I'd begin my week of blogging with some shameless pandering to the chocolate lover in all of you. Personally, I'm allergic and have no idea what it means to be a chocoholic so I have no problem sharing the following information about FREE Mars Brand Chocolate originally written by Coupon Dad on his site.

Every Friday through September, Mars is giving away FREE chocolate products of your choosing!

To receive your FREE chocolate coupon you need to be one of the first 250,000 people at this web site on Friday morning starting at 9:00 am EST. Remember this is every Friday through September.

http://realchocolate.com/

Limit: one (1) Coupon per email address per Friday and four (4) Coupons per household during the Offer Period.

More details on this promotion can be found here.

What a week! It got off on the wrong foot carrying baggage from last week. But it came to a close on a positive note yesterday. Now onto the weekend...

...but before I sign off for the week I figured I'd leave you with some words of wisdom from my littlest one as my biggest one is currently suffering all sorts of physical ailments due to the monstrous growth spurt he's currently experiencing and has been rendered completely useless.

After you finish reading (and commenting on) this post, check out the Dads that are doing it well, over at Dad-Blogs.com!

Thanks for the great comments on yesterday's post. They're still coming in and I now have a poll to go along with it, so please cast your vote.

I write on this blog, but in my heart and mind (if not in reality) I am a writer. I have a relationship with words. And with words as the Bible warns, I've learned how to create and destroy. But so much more than that, I dream with my eyes wide open through my words and I'm blessed to be able to do so.

'Nough said. Below is the first chapter of something that I don't have a title for right now. It's my gift to you folks. Some of it might sound familiar depending on how much you read this blog.

Enjoy!

Mother's Day aside, the last fourteen days have been extremely unpleasant for me. It happens to all of us at one point or another where everything comes crashing down all at once. Well laid plans go bust and dreams get deferred against your will no matter how hard you try. I am one who believes wholeheartedly in the idea of every setback being a setup, especially as a believer in Christian doctrine, a witness to miracles and a man who's faith has driven him through certain failure to success. But the last two weeks reduced me to a snarling, backbiting, hate-speaking mess of a man. And it all ended in tears in front of the one woman who knows me just about as well as I know myself: my mom. And the woman who knows me almost as much, my wife, helped me wipe away the tears.

In the midst of all this it dawned on me that in my wife and I's pursuit of a great life for our family we have consistently overlooked the fact that we never went on a honeymoon. Yes, we got married in Barbados, but we left right afterward, plugging ourselves right back into the belly of the beast that is New York and barely missing a beat in the parenting department as all of us with kids know we must do (I hope you know this).

But my wife deserves her honeymoon --- our honeymoon. And I'd like to include you guys in the planning if possible as I begin my quest do right by her in this regard. I had a sheet of paper where we listed our top choices and now it and the notebook it was in have gone missing in my house. I completely expect to find it after I publish this post. I do vaguely remember our options, but none of the specifics:

1. Europe - Paris, Portugal, Spain
2. South America - Argentina, Brazil
   
3. The South Pacific - Fiji Islands, etc.
   
4. A bunch of Mediterranean Isles (I think)
   
5. Morrocco

So what did I do for the mothers in my life on Mother's Day?

• After being out until 3am at a friend's birthday party the night before I begged my wife to go to church with me. She yelled at me to let her sleep.
  
• After she woke up, I gave my wife a Mother's Day balloon because she hates flowers then I took her to brunch at the neighborhood diner.
• We went to collect our son from my mother-in-law (where he had spent the night) and then we went to the hotel where my parents are staying during their week-long visit and collected the baby.
• We went home to get ready for dinner where I had a reservation for 13 at Brasserie Les Halles on Park Avenue.
• I passed out cards and gifts to wife, mom and the wife took care of the mother-in-law. I gave a toast then we chowed down on some serious food. I had the Flatiron Steak with green peppercorn sauce (ate it in 5 minutes flat) paired with home cut pommes frites (of course), a mescelun salad and a glass of Shiraz that remained full no matter how many times I drank it dry. Hmmm....
  

• Play it first thing Sunday morning.
• Play it for your wife as she opens her eyes and you're placing breakfast in bed in front of her.
• Play it in the car on the way home from church.
• Play it while everyone gets up for the day.
• Play it as background music in the middle of the day while everyone's up and running around.
• Sing along together with the songs you know.
• Play it on Sunday after the kids go to bed. Try not to make anymore kids.
• Just play it.

1. Lost Without You - Robin Thicke
2. Good Morning - John Legend
3. I'm Glad You're Mine - Al Green
4. All I Do - Stevie Wonder
5. Staying In Love - Raphael Saadiq
6. What A Wonderful World - Louis Armstrong
7. U&I - Emily King
8. Heaven Must Be Like This - D'Angelo
9. I Wanna Be Where You Are - Michael Jackson
10. Sure Hope You Mean It - Raphael Saadiq
11. I'll Always Love My Mama - The Intruders
    
12. Lovely Day - Bill Withers

It's a nice mix of R&B/Soul classics from yesteryear and a couple of tracks that probably will be classic in the years to come.

If you already have these tracks, great! It's a great play, trust me. If you don't you can download the playlist here, appropriately and boringly titled: A Mother's Day Mix 2009.
You can download the mix here by clicking the appropriate and boringly titled If you don't you can download the mix here onto your iTunes account just as soon as the mix becomes live (this hasn't happened yet - not sure why). Check back here between now and Saturday for the link to this iMix. Feel free to add your suggestions and if they make sense, then I'll add them to the mix that (drumroll) once again will be downloadable from the iTunes store onto your iTunes account as soon as it becomes live.

Happy Mother's Day, Happy Fatherhood Friday and Happy Friday.


After you finish reading (and commenting on) this post, check out the Dads that are doing it well, over at Dad-Blogs.com!

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I ran across a great website yesterday while I was swimming around in the madness that is Twitter. It's called Simple Kids --- Uncomplicated Parenting in a Complicated World. The title alone was enough to catch my eye as this is what I'm currently striving to achieve in my own life.

One of their recent posts stuck a chord with me: Seperating Yourself From Your Children's "Stuff". Please see the article that appeared originally on the Simple Kids blog, below:

Fans of Simple Mom know that her Spring Cleaning Party begins today. I’ve purchased and downloaded her e-book and I am ready to go. My home is in need of a clutter purge! And when it comes to the amount of toy clutter that sweeps across the floors of our home on a daily basis . . . well, it is enough to make me just want to lay down on the floor and give up. I’d have to clear off a spot amidst the blocks and books and baby dolls, of course, first.

In the chapter on decluttering and cleaning the rooms of your children, Tsh warns that when it comes to purging toys, parents can “prepare for some possible emotional battles.” My children are not quite yet to the age where they get a keep/toss/donate vote on each toy, and in fact, most of my toy decluttering is done while they sleep. Yet I find that the emotional battles that are the most difficult in sorting through my children’s toys are fought within myself.

I would not say I have superhuman memory powers, but I do have the uncanny (and when it comes to decluttering - inconvenient) knack for remembering where most every toy in our home came from. This makes the purging process particularly difficult for me. I pick up the blinking and bleeping toy laptop and remember fondly the occasion on which it was present to my oldest daughter by her grandparents. Nearly every stuff animal in the monstrous heap in which they all reside has some kind of fond story of a loved one attached to it. I find it to be almost physically painful to toss or donate these things which were lovingly chosen and given to my daughters. But the weed-out process is necessary if we don’t want to drown beneath a sea of kiddie clutter, so I’ve written out these steps to make the process a little bit less painful for me.

1. Mantra: Getting rid of a toy does not mean getting rid of a relationship.
Logically, I know this is absolutely true. Emotionally, this is where I struggle. I must focus on the fact that finding a new home for a toy given to the girls by one of their favorite aunts does absolutely nothing to damage the relationship they have with that aunt. Their relationship is not built on them receiving gifts from her. If she never gave them another toy, they would still adore her just as much.

2. Consider alternate “dumping grounds.”
My husband’s parents had already been grandparents for nine years when my oldest daughter was born, so their house has long been a fun haven for my children to visit. On the other hand, our oldest daughter is the oldest grandchild on my side of the family, and my parents have not yet collected an expansive toy collection for entertaining the little ones. This week, I’ll be packing up and taking several boxes of toys from our home to my parents’ home. This way, the toys that we have special attachments to won’t be gone for good, just gone from our toyroom.

3. Be realistic.
When a toy has been played with and loved on for a long time, I find that I want to tuck away and keep it in a special place for the girls to have and keep when they leave home. I think this is a fine idea, but I have to remember they aren’t going to want an extra large U-Haul box full of toys traveling with them from college dorm to first apartment to first home. How will I decide? I’ll probably just have to cross my fingers and go with my gut in making these decisions.

In the creative family, Amanda Blake Soule writes

When it comes to playthings for our children, I can’t emphasize enough that for creative play, less really is more in regard to toys . . . A sad product of our modern world is that our children are taught early on to overconsume and want more, more, and more.

I know the hearts of the people in our lives who love our girls, and I know they would not want this outcome for them. I know they would ultimately want the girls to have bright, organized, inspiring spaces to play - spaces that have just enough instead of way too much in the way of toys, even if that means finding a new home for something they gave to the girls as a gift. And I think I’ll find this to be the most helpful motivating thought as I attempt to invite more simplicity into our home this week.

Do you get emotional when you sort through your children’s toys? Or do you tend to be more practical? What are your best toy decluttering thoughts, tips, and strategies?

It used to happen to me repeatedly. Mother's Day would sneak up on me and WHAM! I was running around scrambling to find something for my mom, usually at a premium because I waited so long.

The Internet has since eased this predicament somewhat and over here at MakesMeWannaHoller.com I want to help out too. I've got some quick suggestions just in case you need something for the mothers you love --- the ones that birthed you and/or the ones who birthed your children.

If she likes flowers:

• Send 12 Assorted Mother's Day Roses + 6 FREE + FREE vase, $29.99!
• Save $20 on 20 Assorted Tulips for Mom, plus get a FREE vase, only $29.99!
• FREE Chocolates and Vase with 24 Assorted Petite Roses, $34.99!
• Save $10 on Potted Mother's Day Roses, only $39.99!

• Get $5 shipping on all orders through Mother’s Day at Motherhood Maternity. Offer ends May 10.
• Get $5 shipping on all orders through Mother’s Day at Destination Maternity. Offer ends May 10.
• Get $5 shipping on all orders through Mother’s Day at A Pea in the Pod. Offer ends May 10.
• Celebrate Mothers-to-be Day at Motherhood Maternity!
• Celebrate Mothers-to-be Day at A Pea in the Pod!

• iTunes Gift Certificates – Easy, last-minute Gifts for the Holidays
• iTunes Gifts

Remember this?



Remember him?

Remember the time?

Ahh...Da Bulls.

Happy Hump Day. Whatever your struggle may be...keep tryin'.

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My friends over at State Farm (a place where I worked during the late '90s) sent me the following:

I figure I'd start the week off on the right foot with a song. Music is such an integral part of my life. It began with nursery rhymes, then church songs, Negro spirituals, songs on the radio, playing piano for 13 years (composing music for one or two years), embracing hip hop and R&B, getting swept up in Chicago House music and Deep House (disco for all of you not in the know), Queen (that's all I have to say), falling in love with jazz after college, and getting into Rock after Iron Man hit the screens last year, and in the midst of it I've LOVED neo-soul --- Jill Scott and 'em.

But this brother right here, Maxwell? Is on a whole ---- novah (voice rising) --- levahl (eyes looking skyward)! Friends, exes, a former boss (oops) and my wife --- I've watched all of them turn into boiling, babbling, moaning, panting sirens as soon as this man starts singing. And if you've been to his concerts (I've been to all of them) it's so much worse. [Side note: Sadly, my wife broke two toes on her left foot last week, but managed to excitedly hop on one foot over to the computer when she heard this song.] I can't hate cause it's always worked to my advantage by the end of the night. And truthfully, he's got it goin' on. Here's a guy, who from all outward appearances, seems to be all about love and romance. If we could all take a page from his book...

This is his new single off of what I can only hope is his God-awfully long to drop follow-up album to his last three joints. There's really no info out there other than this single. Let's hope it's soon! Click here to download it on your iTunes account now.

Happy week, y'all!

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I've absolutely LOVE this video! It just sums things up, point blank.

When this spot first aired on TV my wife looked over at me and said, "That is so, YOU!"

I laughed and agreed.

Since then, everyone from my daughter's allergist to my coworkers have said the same thing. But actually he doesn't look anything like me. But maybe it's:

• the bald head thing
• the fierce cheer he's leading (and the moves)
• the spirited sassy daughter thing

After you finish reading (and commenting on) this post, check out the Dads that are doing it well, over at Dad-Blogs.com!